Catullus 23 Translation
Introduction
In this poem, Catullus directly addresses Furius, who is another poet in his social circle. Furius may have had an affair with Catullus’s male lover, Juventius. He could be the man who is referred to as the other man in poem #24.
In the first line, Catullus accuses Furius of having no slaves or money boxes. He doesn’t even have a bug, spider, or fire, either. He does have a father and stepmother. Catullus refers to Furius’s teeth in line four, saying they can chew a flintstone. In lines five and six, Catullus says that Furius and his father both enjoy the father’s wife, calling Furius’s penis a dry stick. He uses the dry stick to enjoy the mother.
Then, in the next five lines (7-11), Catullus writes about Furius’s health and hunger. He talks about Furius’s ability to digest and he has no reason to be afraid of anything. He talks about how his health protects him from everything, including plots to poison him.
In lines 12 and 13, Catullus comments on Furius’s dryness. He describes him in a simile, comparing his “bodies” to a dry horn. Then, he uses hyperbole by saying he is drier than anything drier. We learn in line 14 that the dryness comes from him fasting and being in the cold and sun. Then, in line 15, Catullus asks how else Furius could be so healthy and wealthy? This goes against the first statement that Furius has no money or servants.
In lines 16 and 17, Catullus explains that Furius has no moisture - no sweat, spit, or running from his nose. In line 18, Catullus talks about how clean he is. Then, in lines 19 and 20, we learn that Furius’s anus is clean and pure because he only defecates 10 times per year. Catullus then spends the next three lines commenting on the quality of Furius’s waste - that it is hard and clean. In line 23, Catullus says the waste wouldn’t even dirty his finger.
In the final four lines, Catullus tells Furius that he should think highly of his blessings. He should not look down on being so dry. He does not need to pray for money because he has so much wealth as it is. In a few other poems, Catullus wrote about a woman’s lack of moisture. Dryness is not something that Catullus finds attractive, so this poem insults Furius more than it complements him.
Carmen 23
| Line | Latin text | English translation |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | FVRI, cui neque seruus est neque arca | Furius, you who have neither a slave, nor a money-box, |
| 2 | nec cimex neque araneus neque ignis, | nor a bug, nor a spider, nor a fire, |
| 3 | uerum est et pater et nouerca, quorum | but who have a father and a stepmother too, |
| 4 | dentes uel silicem comesse possunt, | whose teeth can chew even a flintstone, |
| 5 | est pulcre tibi cum tuo parente | you lead a merry life with your father |
| 6 | et cum coniuge lignea parentis. | and with that dry stick, your father’s wife. |
| 7 | nec mirum: bene nam ualetis omnes, | No wonder: you all enjoy the best health, |
| 8 | pulcre concoquitis, nihil timetis, | your digestions are excellent, you have nothing to be afraid of: |
| 9 | non incendia, non graues ruinas, | fires, dilapidations, |
| 10 | non facta impia, non dolos ueneni, | cruel pilferings, plots to poison you, |
| 11 | non casus alios periculorum. | other chances of danger. |
| 12 | atque corpora sicciora cornu | And besides this, your bodies are as dry as horn, |
| 13 | aut siquid magis aridum est habetis | or drier still if drier thing there be, |
| 14 | sole et frigore et esuritione. | what with sun and cold and fasting. |
| 15 | quare non tibi sit bene ac beate? | How you be otherwise than well and prosperous? |
| 16 | a te sudor abest, abest saliua, | You are free from sweat, free from spittle, |
| 17 | mucusque et mala pituita nasi. | and rheum and troublesome running of the nose. |
| 18 | hanc ad munditiem adde mundiorem, | To this cleanliness, add an even cleaner one, |
| 19 | quod culus tibi purior salillo est, | that your anus is purer than a little salt-cellar, |
| 20 | nec toto decies cacas in anno; | and you defecate no more than ten times in a whole year, |
| 21 | atque id durius est faba et lapillis. | and that is harder than a bean or pebbles; |
| 22 | quod tu si manibus teras fricesque, | if you were to squeeze it or rub it with your hands, |
| 23 | non umquam digitum inquinare posses | you could never dirty your finger. |
| 24 | haec tu commoda tam beata, Furi, | Since you have such blessings as these, Furius, |
| 25 | noli spernere nec putare parui, | do not despise them or think lightly of them; |
| 26 | et sestertia quae soles precari | and cease to pray, as you do, for the hundred sestertia; |
| 27 | centum desine: nam sat es beatus. | for you are quite well off enough as it is. |
